Saturday, May 12, 2012

Special Saturday--Recap of Guilty Pleasures, Chapter Two

It’s that time again. Time to recap another chapter of Guilty Pleasures. I’m doing it half asleep, so I can give it a fairly unbiased review. If I’m fully awake my annoyance may get the better of me.
Right off the bat I’m scratching my head.

St. Louis has more tress edging its highways than any other city I have driven through.

I’m scratching my head because I’m not entirely sure where she’s going with this. Is she saying there’s a lot of canopy roads in St. Louis? A quick Google shows St. Louis to… not have a lot of canopy roads. So the trees can’t be too close. But the word choice indicates neither are they too far away. It’s such a throw away line in the grand scheme of things that I have no idea why it’s there, other than to give Anita something to complain about.

Which is followed by more complaining and the first color of the chapter. Her apartment is depressingly white and cheerful. Yes, scratch your head on that. It’s depressing or it’s cheerful. Pick one. Build off of that. Oh wait, she does, following it up by calling the walls vanilla ice cream white. I’m surprised we didn’t get a more detailed description—french vanilla, creamy vanilla, etc. Juxtapose that with a description of dog poop brown carpet (thankfully not hers) and I’m pretty turned off food for the moment.

Then there’s some bitching about the windows. Yes, the windows. I get that if you’re working night shift, you hate sunlight like (hahaha) vampires, but once your internal clock gets used to the switch, it doesn’t make a difference if it’s light out or not. You’ll sleep. I know, I’ve worked plenty of night shifts and I’ve known plenty of people who work night shifts.

But everybody needs something to bitch about.

Sleep sucked me under to the soft music of Chopin. A minute later the phone rang.

This is something I don’t understand. If you’re tired enough to pretty much pass out, there’s a good possibility you’re not going to hear the phone, especially when you first go under. And again, if you do most of your work at night or in hurried circumstances, you can pretty much train your brain to just shut off. Doctors are (in)famous for these. So either she’s not really that asleep or she’s just that awesome.

Wait. I think I know the answer to that.

Oh, but hold on. A quick glance at the bedside clock shows it’s been two hours. This is one of those cases where an extra word or two would have gone a long way.

Not that it matters, since in the next hundred or so words we get told Anita only had two hours of sleep three different times. This is the problem I’m having with this book already. Nothing gets said about the most basic of things at what would be considered the appropriate time and then you get hammered with it repeatedly. This could prove annoying.

Much like Anita finds Monica. Granted, I find anyone who wakes me up when I’m not ready to get up annoying. I think most people do. But Anita sort of next levels it, if you will. Even while she says she’s not that rude, she pretty much is. And she’s condescending to boot.

I wondered if screaming at her would make her go away faster. Naw, she’d probably cry.

Why? Because she’s excited about a wedding and a bridesmaid dress (another color, pink) and a bachelorette party? Does this somehow mean that instead of getting pissed off when someone just starts yelling at her that she is honor bound to break into tears? I had no idea there was a direct correlation to ovaries and tear ducts. How shocking.

We also get to find out some more things Anita hates. The list for this chapter includes:

Sunrises
Windows
Bridesmaids’ dresses (although a lot of women would agree here)
Dancing
I think I’m seeing why Anita works at night. She hates life. Okay, that’s a little harsh, but that’s the picture being painted.

Anita hangs up after promising to be the DD (which she also didn’t like doing, but she didn’t hate, so it didn’t make the list) and lays in bed wondering about the organizational skills of a woman she’s never met. Because when I’m tired, that’s what runs through my mind to lull me back to sleep.

Eventually she does fall back asleep. Yeah. Another chapter finished.





1 comment:

  1. God, I'd forgotten how little happens in these books sometimes...even the early ones!

    ReplyDelete